Didja hear about Ol’ Father Olgivy ??
That’s right, he’s the fat, old ex-priest who lives at the top of the house next to the tree, next to the pub.
Yeah, the one with that punker girl barmaid who’s got those enormous tits.
…No-one had seen the old bloke for a while, which ain’t that unusual, old people being they is, but then the people who live below him started complaining of the smell.
When they knocked and got no answer, they got my mate Rog to bust the door in.
The way I hear it, the first couple of people through the door ran back out, and yakked up on the stairs. Pretty ha-ha.
Looking around his rooms, they found all this swirly writing and numbers, with candles an’ stuff.
In the main room was this pile of blood’n’bits, which they reckon is ol’ man Ogilvy, but they can’t be sure because they can’t tell who it is.
When they cleaned up the body, they found more swirly writing, circles, bits of paint and more candles under all the blood’n’bits.
The way I hear it, when they added all the bits together, the head’s missing…
…Which is really gross. I mean, what happened to the head ?? Where’d it go ??
You get some sick bastards in this world…